Well, I swore I would never do another challenge, because the last time I signed myself up for the 60 day one I fell hard so off the wagon at Day 47 or so that I didn't return to a regular practice for 4 years! However, that was back then, and this is now. I am wiser, stronger, fitter, healthier and plunge forward armed with a will of steel.
Mistakes I made from my last challenge that I will not make this time:
Overeating
Eating the wrong kind of food
Not sleeping enough
Overdoing it every class
Drinking too much alcohol
Not drinking enough water
Not getting enough massages
Ta-da! That is the exhaustive list.
There are several reasons I'm keen on doing this challenge. I'll get back to them in a minute.
I do believe that I have the physical stamina to make it through this challenge. My only concerns are being in the bridal party for an in-town wedding next month that has lots of other events attached to it, (stagette, shower, rehearsal dinner, family get-togethers, etc.), and a weekend out of town near the end of May. I am also quite busy with work and other projects, my social life, an unusually high requirement for downtime that is necessary to my sanity, toying with the idea of getting a second job, other athletics, not to mention the fact that I am trying to invite romance into my life. Um, wait a second. Yikes!
However, I don't think the rules about doubles are that stringent at my studio, and if I squeeze in a few 6 am'ers, which I hate, but are very good for strengthening the will, I should be able to pull it off. I want to pull it off. I can do it!
In addition to everything I just mentioned, I was contemplating how much my friends and family have protested during previous challenges I've committed myself to over the years, leaving as they do my already tight schedule even less open to requests like accompaniment to the mall, acquaintances' birthday celebrations, and attendance at pointless hangout sessions. The truth is, this is an opportunity to just say no, something I've struggled with. I believe we're conditioned to believe that saying 'no' and putting our own asses first makes us second rate citizens, and I have certainly been guilty of a severe reluctance to say no, and when I do, man does the guilt come pouring down like a tropical rainstorm.
But as I've aged, I've come to realize the value of being selfish. The need to say no. I think in the end we do our loved ones a disservice by not making our own prominent needs and desires top priority in our own lives. Also, putting oneself last consistently over the years (which is exactly what we do when we let our jobs and the people in our lives take precedence over taking proper care of ourselves, or just putting off the things we really want to do for so long we forgot we ever had important things we ever wanted to do) causes cancer. That's a fact!
So when people tell me they're running a race or wearing a yellow flower or rubber band around their wrist for cancer (all of which contributes to the problem, in my opinion, as it perpetuates the false notion that what we're really after here is a 'cure') I am going to tell them that I am doing my part by saying 'no' to things I really don't want to do and 'yes' to what I actually want to do. For cancer! No, not to cure it. To prevent it, of course. And I sincerely hope that everyone I know starts doing the same.
Moving along, why do I want to do this?
Well, I've been averaging about 3-4 classes a week for the past couple of months, and although that's quite good, I feel in my heart that I'd like to step it up a notch. Also, the last time I practiced regularly before this 7 month period that I have been going strong with, I was on a challenge, which, as I mentioned, I failed to complete, and this has been hanging over my head. I did complete about 4 or 5 previous 30 day challenges prior to that, but they were so hard for me. I struggled so much, and then my practice would always drop off afterwards for weeks at a time. I really want to do this one right.
I should also mention that I am considering, in a rather lighthearted way that is still in the wistful phase, that I am considering the teacher training program for Fall of this year, or next year. I have told a few people about this. I should mention right away that I truly don't know if I have what it takes to go to teacher training. It seems crazy. The sleep deprivation aspect especially makes it extremely daunting. I also don't know if I am a strong enough yogi to represent to the masses. For instance, I am not the type of practitioner that teachers and studio directors would approach to go to training - nothing like that! Then there's the time off work - nine weeks is a long time. And I don't know where the money will come from.
All of that being said, I've been on this scene for over 7 years. I know the drill. I believe in the system. I support the franchise. I already have faith that I am an excellent teacher, and intellectually, I am capable of the job. I feel I have something unique and valuable to offer. Anyway, all that really matters is that the seed of desire exists inside of me, and this has become a tentative goal, or plan. And in any case, I feel that completing this challenge (or unable to complete it due to lack of will) could at least be an indication of whether this is truly not an option for me at this time.
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