Today was Day 19, but only my eighteenth class of of the Challenge.
It was also my fiftieth class in total since March 15th, 2006 :) Not exactly "every day for two full months", but not too shabby all the same.
I missed class AGAIN yesterday, bringing me into my third double (planned for Thursday) of this challenge. I read challenge rules posted on another studio's website and this isn't even allowed. However, it was kind of up in the air how many times you could skip class and make up for it at my studio so I think I am in the clear, but wow, it can't happen again. It is all on account of going out and drinking too much and then finding myself unable to get to class the day after, hungover, when I probably need it the most.
But I went to Whistler this weekend!!
So, I ended up doing my second double last Thursday instead of Tuesday, meaning I attended 6 AM on both days. I missed class this morning (attending 6:15 PM instead), but I'll have to do it again this Thursday as that's the day I plan to do my third double. I'm very inflexible at this time of morning and I find myself dreading a full day of work following practice. I need to get over these humps because it is really convenient to get up and start the day off with a nice practice, and then have my evening totally free.
I have found a little trick for increasing flexibility and stamina during class: a quick (under ten minutes) jog beforehand. I don't know if this would come recommended or is even good for me, but I've done it three times now and the result was the three best practices of my life! It seems to increase my energy at least two-fold, and if I can jog AND stretch before class, like I did this evening, my flexibility is awesome.
This notwithstanding, I've also had some crappy classes lately (namely, Saturday and Sunday morning, both at 8 AM). Also, my lower back hurt a lot over the weekend - it felt sciatic as it went down into my thighs. The two hour drive to Whistler and back was particularly painful and I even had to get out of the car to stretch. I've never had back pain like that before. However, it feels much better today and I can't help but think that it might have been a good idea to skip class yesterday, also since it was the beginning of my period. They say that Bikram's is clear for menstruating women as there are no inverted postures, but I had a pretty brutal class last month on the first day of my period.
I think I'm ready to go over each posture again and talk about any change or progression:
1. Pranayama Breathing
I’ve begun to develop a concern that I am moving my back on the exhale. I’m probably not, but it occurred to me a couple of times that if you don’t pay attention (and it’s easy to go on autopilot after all this time), you might cease to breathe correctly.
2. Half Moon Pose with Hands to Feet Pose
Vast improvement in Half Moon. I don’t go too deep in the first set but in the second I am able to go down much further, and I look right. No longer excruciating, and second set actually feels pretty good.
My backbend varies depending on how my back is doing that day. I have a lot of lower back pain, especially at the beginning of class if I am not very warm. On the forward bend, I really take it easy first set and walk my hips out for as long as possible. If I am not warm, it can be extremely painful.
On a good day I can sandwich my body against my legs and practically lock out my knees. However, I still have trouble touching my pinky fingers in back as my hands go out the side of my heels. I don’t know how I can improve this.
3. Awkward Pose
Arghh. I dread this pose now. First part drags forever, and I still can’t go down very far in second part without my right knee cap feeling really sore. I have my heels way up so at least my form is right, but I can’t get my thighs parallel with the ground. Third part is very good, but my knees can get testy.
4. Eagle Pose
I am still having trouble in Eagle with balance - I can usually get my toes right around my calf. I haven’t tried putting my hands in Namaskar as I don’t feel that my form is good enough yet. It’s improving, though.
5. Standing Head-to-Knee
Again, lots of improvement here but it has been fairly slow. I can kick both legs out on the second set for a portion of the pose, without losing my balance. My right leg is stronger than my left, and I can kick my left leg out for longer. I can hold first set for the full sixty seconds on a good day, but I still have a ways to go with keeping that knee locked out for the full time. I’m just not strong enough yet.
However, I’m developing some crazy muscle in my thigh!
6. Standing Bow
I came to realize a few weeks ago that I wasn’t really locking my knee in this pose. I am sure to now, and as a result, I often don’t go as deep. On a bad day, I have a lot of trouble holding my balance and I have felt disappointed in myself. Today was good, though, and I held the pose very well. I went deep second set, and my leg half-way up the shin is visible in the mirror on my right side. On the left, I can see just above the ankle. Also, my form wasn’t the greatest on the left side at first but I think I’ve almost overcome it.
7. Balancing Stick
Much better. Apparently, I DO look like a “T” now, I’ve been told! I find this posture invigorating and satisfying.
8. Standing Separate Leg Stretching
Another potentially painful pose. I cannot grasp my heels - I’m lucky if I can grab the sides of my feet with my knees locked out and not pass out with pain. My head isn’t on the floor, but it’s getting there. Slow, steady improvement.
9. Triangle Pose
Hands-down, the toughest pose of the entire series. Triangle calls for the most strength and the deepest concentration. I have to fight the temptation to make the twist before my thigh is completely parallel to the ground for some reason - I’m not sure why I’m reluctant as it’s easier this way. Laziness, I guess. On a bad day, I skip one set of Trikanasana. I know I shouldn’t but I absolutely can’t resist.
10. Standing Separate Leg Head-to-Knee
Wobble wobble wobble. Although I can’t keep my hands in prayer without tipping from side to side, my front leg is almost completely straight on a good day. During the tougher classes, I bend my knee or face crippling lower back pain.
11. Tree Pose
I look a bit better in Tree than I used to, standing up taller. Sometimes I lose my balance, strangely, and other times my concentration. It’s easy to drift off in this pose.
12. Toe Stand
Wow. I have come a long way in this pose. Today - on both sides - I was able to get one hand up in Namaskar once I was down, and I pushed myself up without any great exertion or danger of falling out. I was very strong in this pose today, and I feel much sturdier.
13. Savasana
Still loving it when this rolls around. Got to remember not to scratch and wipe. I have this problem where sweat drips into my ear and it really bugs me, so I like to wear a hair band in class.
14. Wind Removing Pose
A few classes ago a teacher told me that I was “hanging out” in the first part of this pose. Harrumph!!! So maybe I was…but I’ve been doing better. I can grip both elbows even when I am dripping with sweat in shorts now, so I must be getting stronger.
15. Sit-Up
I *need* sit-up for Head-to-Knee later on. If sit-ups aren’t going well, Head-to-Knee will be very painful.
16. Cobra
Okay, I finally realized how to do this pose properly. I don’t know what I was doing before, but I was using too much arm-strength. Now it’s almost entirely my lower back. Still, the easiest of the spine-strengthening series.
17. Locust
I love to slack off in this pose…I seem to have reached a plateau in height in the third part of the posture as I don’t feel I’m getting my legs up any higher than I was even a month ago. It’s probably because I’ve been slacking.
18. Full Locust
I try to give this my best shot, even on bad days. My sister said I looked good when she caught a glimpse of me a couple classes ago.
19. Bow Pose
Still super tough. Sometimes I find myself falling out of the pose early, which I hate to do. It takes a lot of effort to give maximum effort for the full twenty seconds on both sets.
20. Fixed Firm
My knees are starting to hurt in this pose. I can still go into it fully, though.
21. Half-Tortoise
I don’t see any improvement in this pose, so I’m not sure where I’m going wrong, if anywhere. I still can’t get my forehead to touch before my hands, I still can’t get my nose to touch, and I still can’t lift my hands up so that only the “razor-edge” of my pinky fingers are touching. Oh well.
22. Camel Pose
I never sit this one out anymore - I find it very valuable. Sometimes I don’t put my hands down on first set, but almost always on second. I still have concern that my hips, thighs and stomach aren’t far forward enough, but I feel improvement. They say you shouldn’t be resting any weight on your ankles, but I still do. Less, though. I like this pose very much.
23. Rabbit
This pose is tiring and uncomfortable for me. I have trouble doing both sets for the full length.
24. Head-to-Knee
I still dread this pose because the third part is so painful. I can’t stop repeating the words “if you can, you must” because I am always tempted to not lift my heels. I can lift my heels for the entire portion now, but it takes maximal effort.
Anyway, I had a huge breakthrough in the first and second parts of the pose today - previously I was unable to keep my individual legs straight and had to bend at the knee, sometimes quite a bit. However, somehow, today, I was able to flatten out my left leg completely and my right let just about. Unbelievable, what happened?!
25. Spine-Twisting Pose
I want to slack in this pose because it’s the last one, but I usually don’t. No major concerns here.
26. Kapalbhati Breathing
I finally got the breathing down - it took me an extra long time to figure it out. I used to get cramps under my feet and feel a bit dizzy, but all of that seems to be a thing of the past now.
Well, there they are. On a final note, I'd like to also mention that I have made it a point to stop wiping my sweat away at any point during the class, and I am much better for it.
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
First 6AM Class
Well, I haven't been doing the greatest job of keeping my 30-day journal updated. Today is Day 12 (unbelievable, already?) but I missed class on Sunday so I have to do a double today for the second time. I don't even know if this is allowed. Anyway, it will be much easier going this time around as I was able to do the first class at 6AM (a mere 10.25 hours after I finished my last class at 7:45PM yesterday) and I'll either go to 6:15 or 8:15 tonight. Then I will be caught up.
I'll be honest: the first double, last Wednesday, was tough. I had planned on taking it really easy during the first class but instead I felt compelled to push to my edge. I don't know why, exactly. I brought a new towel and a change of clothes for round two (which commenced half an hour after the prior class finished) and drank a litre of water with electrolytes. I was really surprised by how much I sweat during the second class as I thought I didn't have any fluid left in my body by that point, but I was drenched all over again. I had to lie through a few poses in the second class due to sheer fatigue. All in all, though, I felt pretty all right when it was all over, but I was too pumped to get a really good night's sleep. I thought I'd pass out immediately, but it was like I had drank three cups of coffee before going to bed.
I missed Thursday's class and headed back for 6:15PM on Friday. That class was a killer. I had drank alcohol the night before which of course never helps matters, and I found just remaining in the room near intolerable let alone going through all the poses. Laying down didn't help matters at all, as the room felt unbearably hot. Also, I was so sleepy that during each savasana I could barely keep my eyes open. Wretched!! I literally had to drag myself home.
Nonetheless, I trooped off to 8AM Saturday morning thinking it would be a slow, sparsely populated, easy-going class. Hah! I was dead wrong. The hot room was packed solid with people eager to get their yoga out of the way in order to enjoy the weekend, and it turned out to be another tough one. I would have loved something in my stomach as I hadn't even eaten since before the last class, so I was pretty starved. Thirsty, too. My sister was along with me so that was rather comforting, and I no longer find her to be such a distraction in class (before I would find myself staring at her constantly and involuntarily trying to match or go beyond her depth in the poses, even when I wasn't ready). Not a terrible class, but not particularly smooth, either.
I had planned to go Sunday afternoon, but Saturday night was a big one, making the entire next day a complete write-off. My sister wasn't able to attend class, either. Instead I enjoyed a leisurely Mother's Day dinner and a night of watching movies. Phew, that felt really good.
Last night's class (Monday), went fairly well. Standing series was kind of hard as I felt really tired for some reason, and by the time we hit Tree Pose I felt like I could use a nap. However, floor series went well, even spine-strengthening series. I got stronger and stronger as the end of the class neared, and then I sailed right out of there! Too bad standing series was so monstrous.
And that brings me to this morning's class at 6AM. I tried my best to get to sleep as early as possible last night but I fear it wasn't until around 11:00, and I got up around 5:30. Not too bad. By the time I ran into the studio I only had minutes to spare, so no time for stretching. I was really surprised to see a new girl in class today - I don't think I'd be very keen on having my very first class at that hour. Once again, standing series was tougher than floor series. During both classes I found it very difficult to hold Standing Head to Knee and Standing Bow as I can't seem to keep my strength up or hold my balance. I know I'm giving up too soon but I can't seem to help it.
I'll be honest: the first double, last Wednesday, was tough. I had planned on taking it really easy during the first class but instead I felt compelled to push to my edge. I don't know why, exactly. I brought a new towel and a change of clothes for round two (which commenced half an hour after the prior class finished) and drank a litre of water with electrolytes. I was really surprised by how much I sweat during the second class as I thought I didn't have any fluid left in my body by that point, but I was drenched all over again. I had to lie through a few poses in the second class due to sheer fatigue. All in all, though, I felt pretty all right when it was all over, but I was too pumped to get a really good night's sleep. I thought I'd pass out immediately, but it was like I had drank three cups of coffee before going to bed.
I missed Thursday's class and headed back for 6:15PM on Friday. That class was a killer. I had drank alcohol the night before which of course never helps matters, and I found just remaining in the room near intolerable let alone going through all the poses. Laying down didn't help matters at all, as the room felt unbearably hot. Also, I was so sleepy that during each savasana I could barely keep my eyes open. Wretched!! I literally had to drag myself home.
Nonetheless, I trooped off to 8AM Saturday morning thinking it would be a slow, sparsely populated, easy-going class. Hah! I was dead wrong. The hot room was packed solid with people eager to get their yoga out of the way in order to enjoy the weekend, and it turned out to be another tough one. I would have loved something in my stomach as I hadn't even eaten since before the last class, so I was pretty starved. Thirsty, too. My sister was along with me so that was rather comforting, and I no longer find her to be such a distraction in class (before I would find myself staring at her constantly and involuntarily trying to match or go beyond her depth in the poses, even when I wasn't ready). Not a terrible class, but not particularly smooth, either.
I had planned to go Sunday afternoon, but Saturday night was a big one, making the entire next day a complete write-off. My sister wasn't able to attend class, either. Instead I enjoyed a leisurely Mother's Day dinner and a night of watching movies. Phew, that felt really good.
Last night's class (Monday), went fairly well. Standing series was kind of hard as I felt really tired for some reason, and by the time we hit Tree Pose I felt like I could use a nap. However, floor series went well, even spine-strengthening series. I got stronger and stronger as the end of the class neared, and then I sailed right out of there! Too bad standing series was so monstrous.
And that brings me to this morning's class at 6AM. I tried my best to get to sleep as early as possible last night but I fear it wasn't until around 11:00, and I got up around 5:30. Not too bad. By the time I ran into the studio I only had minutes to spare, so no time for stretching. I was really surprised to see a new girl in class today - I don't think I'd be very keen on having my very first class at that hour. Once again, standing series was tougher than floor series. During both classes I found it very difficult to hold Standing Head to Knee and Standing Bow as I can't seem to keep my strength up or hold my balance. I know I'm giving up too soon but I can't seem to help it.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Day 6 & 7, Together as One.
Yesterday was Day 5 of the challenge, and it went pretty well.
However, Day 4 was a bit of a bust. Fatigued and out of it, I discovered a new trick: NOT trying hard. As I sheepishly looked round the room as I sauntered in and out of the tough poses at my own pace, failing to go far or deep, I happened to notice that I am certainly not the first to discover this trick. Well. It should only be used as a last resort, if ever. I can't see that going to class every day and giving half-assed effort most of the time is better than or even equivalent to giving four solid classes per week. So there!
Anyway, I was actually instructed to give non-maximal effort today as I have to do a dreaded double class. This is my first time and I'm scared, especially since I am tired as it is. I wish I could find my tea tree cream to rub into my leg muscles especially, which are pretty sore.
However, Day 4 was a bit of a bust. Fatigued and out of it, I discovered a new trick: NOT trying hard. As I sheepishly looked round the room as I sauntered in and out of the tough poses at my own pace, failing to go far or deep, I happened to notice that I am certainly not the first to discover this trick. Well. It should only be used as a last resort, if ever. I can't see that going to class every day and giving half-assed effort most of the time is better than or even equivalent to giving four solid classes per week. So there!
Anyway, I was actually instructed to give non-maximal effort today as I have to do a dreaded double class. This is my first time and I'm scared, especially since I am tired as it is. I wish I could find my tea tree cream to rub into my leg muscles especially, which are pretty sore.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Three Classes in a Row: HUNG OVER
So, only 27 days left! Hurray, I'm almost done.
I didn't just drink "a bit" last night, I drank a lot, and it was tough just getting out of bed let alone dragging my sorry ass to yoga at 4:15 PM. However, I did an amazing thing this afternoon - I went to the pool and swam around and lounged in the hot tub and even glided down the waterslide. If it wasn't for this unusual burst of activity I don't know what kind of an awful class I might have had. As it was, however, class was pretty good and I feel much better now than I would have if I'd spent the day laying about shoving food into my face.
Triangle was bearable today, unbelievably.
I usually wear exersise pants to the knee in class but today I wore shorts and I realized that is what I should be wearing. It lets you sweat freely and I was all-around more comfortable. Also, it was the best Eagle of my life with nothing but my bare, sweaty flesh to wrap my legs around. Wind-removing pose is tough with shorts on because my arms slip but I think that only means I was slackin' before. The problem is I only have a couple of pairs of shorts that would be good for yoga and I don't really like either of them, so I will have to get a good pair or two next paycheque.
It's funny how you do start to want to look good in class, or as good as you can possibly look with your hair, face and body sopping wet for most of the class. When I first started doing yoga (Ashtanga) in regular room temperature I thought wearing something special to class was stupid and I refused to buy into the mentality of "cute yoga clothes". Nowadays I'm not as bad as some of the other women at the studio and I will wear an ordinary top if I must, but I fear that's only because I can't really afford to buy more outfits. I go crazy in Lululemon now and it's become fascinating to go in there and look through the new items. Lately, stuff to wear to class is the only thing I want to buy. I've been converted! (After all, we have mirrors at Bikram's and you don't want to look at yourself wearing something wretched.)
Oh yeah, I made a breakthrough in Head-to-Knee. In the third part of the pose I was able to lift my heels up off the ground for the whole time, even though it felt like a killer. I think that I wasn't quite trying hard enough in the sit-ups leading up to the pose so I'll have to remember to push harder so that Head-to-Knee isn't so painful. Because even though it's second-to-last, I've really started to dread it.
Hmmm....not much else that is noteworthy. This week is going to be pretty tough.
I didn't just drink "a bit" last night, I drank a lot, and it was tough just getting out of bed let alone dragging my sorry ass to yoga at 4:15 PM. However, I did an amazing thing this afternoon - I went to the pool and swam around and lounged in the hot tub and even glided down the waterslide. If it wasn't for this unusual burst of activity I don't know what kind of an awful class I might have had. As it was, however, class was pretty good and I feel much better now than I would have if I'd spent the day laying about shoving food into my face.
Triangle was bearable today, unbelievably.
I usually wear exersise pants to the knee in class but today I wore shorts and I realized that is what I should be wearing. It lets you sweat freely and I was all-around more comfortable. Also, it was the best Eagle of my life with nothing but my bare, sweaty flesh to wrap my legs around. Wind-removing pose is tough with shorts on because my arms slip but I think that only means I was slackin' before. The problem is I only have a couple of pairs of shorts that would be good for yoga and I don't really like either of them, so I will have to get a good pair or two next paycheque.
It's funny how you do start to want to look good in class, or as good as you can possibly look with your hair, face and body sopping wet for most of the class. When I first started doing yoga (Ashtanga) in regular room temperature I thought wearing something special to class was stupid and I refused to buy into the mentality of "cute yoga clothes". Nowadays I'm not as bad as some of the other women at the studio and I will wear an ordinary top if I must, but I fear that's only because I can't really afford to buy more outfits. I go crazy in Lululemon now and it's become fascinating to go in there and look through the new items. Lately, stuff to wear to class is the only thing I want to buy. I've been converted! (After all, we have mirrors at Bikram's and you don't want to look at yourself wearing something wretched.)
Oh yeah, I made a breakthrough in Head-to-Knee. In the third part of the pose I was able to lift my heels up off the ground for the whole time, even though it felt like a killer. I think that I wasn't quite trying hard enough in the sit-ups leading up to the pose so I'll have to remember to push harder so that Head-to-Knee isn't so painful. Because even though it's second-to-last, I've really started to dread it.
Hmmm....not much else that is noteworthy. This week is going to be pretty tough.
Saturday, May 06, 2006
Right Before my Very Eyes, I'm on the Thirty Day Challenge
OK, so forget about using the ten days prior to May 15th to prepare for the "30-Day Challenge" - somehow, it started yesterday.
What happened is that the studio put up a big sign-up board with the chart to mark progress, but people just started checking off days as soon as it went up (Wednesday, I think). My sister and I signed up and, knowing that we had the option of starting yesterday or waiting until we were ready, decided it would be best to just go for it. I thought about it all throughout class. I tend to think these things happen for a reason.
I still think this is the best thing to do, it's just that I have drank alcohol for three nights in a row now (yikes), I'm probably going to be drinking tonight, and next weekend we are having a massive rager at our house. Help? I was supposed to be in my best form for this stupid challenge. I should have known - this is exactly how I go into things: completely disorganized and unprepared. (So at least I'm used to it.)
Needless to say, I'm a little worried, but I should still be able to swing this. I have a will of steel!
Meanwhile, regarding yesterday's class:
I feel vast improvement in the fourth part of Half-Moon pose, the forward bend. My top and bottom half are totally glued together now whereas before there was usually lots of room "for light or air". I still can't get my pinky fingers touching underneath my heels, though, and I'm starting to think the problem might be physiological. Why can't I do it? Maybe I should ask someone about it after class.
Now that I can get my toes all the way around my calves in Eagle, my balance has taken a nose dive. Eagle has become a very challenging pose.
I was able to hold second set Standing Bow for the full thirty seconds on both sides.
Triangle was pure torture yesterday. I couldn't even do second set. Oh my God.
The floor series went well but I felt like I did something weird to my leg in Camel. After that pose I was quite anxious for the class to be over. Nonetheless it was a great class and I really did feel a lot better coming out than going in, as I felt kinda crappy yesterday.
I'm actually off to class right now. Bye!
What happened is that the studio put up a big sign-up board with the chart to mark progress, but people just started checking off days as soon as it went up (Wednesday, I think). My sister and I signed up and, knowing that we had the option of starting yesterday or waiting until we were ready, decided it would be best to just go for it. I thought about it all throughout class. I tend to think these things happen for a reason.
I still think this is the best thing to do, it's just that I have drank alcohol for three nights in a row now (yikes), I'm probably going to be drinking tonight, and next weekend we are having a massive rager at our house. Help? I was supposed to be in my best form for this stupid challenge. I should have known - this is exactly how I go into things: completely disorganized and unprepared. (So at least I'm used to it.)
Needless to say, I'm a little worried, but I should still be able to swing this. I have a will of steel!
Meanwhile, regarding yesterday's class:
I feel vast improvement in the fourth part of Half-Moon pose, the forward bend. My top and bottom half are totally glued together now whereas before there was usually lots of room "for light or air". I still can't get my pinky fingers touching underneath my heels, though, and I'm starting to think the problem might be physiological. Why can't I do it? Maybe I should ask someone about it after class.
Now that I can get my toes all the way around my calves in Eagle, my balance has taken a nose dive. Eagle has become a very challenging pose.
I was able to hold second set Standing Bow for the full thirty seconds on both sides.
Triangle was pure torture yesterday. I couldn't even do second set. Oh my God.
The floor series went well but I felt like I did something weird to my leg in Camel. After that pose I was quite anxious for the class to be over. Nonetheless it was a great class and I really did feel a lot better coming out than going in, as I felt kinda crappy yesterday.
I'm actually off to class right now. Bye!
Friday, May 05, 2006
Missing in Class
Whenever I miss yoga class for two days in a row (or more, heaven forbid), I feel completely out of it, like I haven't done it in weeks. I feel as though I don't even "do yoga" anymore, like it's something I used to do in the past. It's peculiar. I think that this is because I'm still in the very beginning stages of developing a practice, and I'm still working hard at establishment.
Right now, the 30-day challenge seems crazy, impossible. I know that it's not, but it will call for a real change in habits for me. I will have to be in best form physically and mentally, and that means (very) limited alchohol, maximum sleep, lots of water and healthy eating. It doesn't sound so hard but maintaining that kind of lifestyle can be as hard, if not harder, as the yoga itself! It's fine now to drag myself to class a bit hungover and sleep-deprived, but it won't be nearly as easy if I'm locked and bound to thirty classes in a row with no days off. Especially working the nine-to-five, because I find it really difficult to catch up on sleep with such a tight, even schedule. It seems strange, as though it should be the opposite, but while I was doing shiftwork and/or in school, I could always manage to catch up on lost sleep every few days. Now it seems that lost sleep is gone forever.
Not really helping matters is the fact that May and June are party months! It will be tough knowing that unless they start offering 6:00 AM classes at my studio, which I could REALLY use, I will always have to rush home straight after work, even if it's sunny and drinks on a patio are calling my name. My social life is already suffering because of the yoga, but I have learned to live with that for the time being. It's just that I work right downtown now, right up off the water, and it's such a beautiful area. I don't want to always have to go straight home. Oh well. There is always after practice.
I am leaving work early today so that I can attend a 4:15 class. Despite all the negativity, I'm looking forward to it. I did Pilates (MW advanced w/ sculpting band) yesterday in a last-ditch effort to get some kind of activity in my day. It felt good to work my arm muscles like that and I do love Pilates, but it just can't compare to yoga.
Right now, the 30-day challenge seems crazy, impossible. I know that it's not, but it will call for a real change in habits for me. I will have to be in best form physically and mentally, and that means (very) limited alchohol, maximum sleep, lots of water and healthy eating. It doesn't sound so hard but maintaining that kind of lifestyle can be as hard, if not harder, as the yoga itself! It's fine now to drag myself to class a bit hungover and sleep-deprived, but it won't be nearly as easy if I'm locked and bound to thirty classes in a row with no days off. Especially working the nine-to-five, because I find it really difficult to catch up on sleep with such a tight, even schedule. It seems strange, as though it should be the opposite, but while I was doing shiftwork and/or in school, I could always manage to catch up on lost sleep every few days. Now it seems that lost sleep is gone forever.
Not really helping matters is the fact that May and June are party months! It will be tough knowing that unless they start offering 6:00 AM classes at my studio, which I could REALLY use, I will always have to rush home straight after work, even if it's sunny and drinks on a patio are calling my name. My social life is already suffering because of the yoga, but I have learned to live with that for the time being. It's just that I work right downtown now, right up off the water, and it's such a beautiful area. I don't want to always have to go straight home. Oh well. There is always after practice.
I am leaving work early today so that I can attend a 4:15 class. Despite all the negativity, I'm looking forward to it. I did Pilates (MW advanced w/ sculpting band) yesterday in a last-ditch effort to get some kind of activity in my day. It felt good to work my arm muscles like that and I do love Pilates, but it just can't compare to yoga.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Good Class Bad Class
And then there are the classes where you're just not into it.
I really wanted to get into the habit of writing in here as soon as I finish class (or soon after) because that's when I remember everything. Now all I remember from Sunday and Monday's classes is that they were great, but yesterday wasn't so hot.
Lots of different stuff affects a practice and although it isn't really possible to guarantee a great class, there are certain things I can do to up my chances of having one. First and foremost, I have to have an empty stomach. If I can feel any food in there whatsoever I will be sluggish at best and, at worst, so dizzy and nauseous I'll have to lie down for extended periods. That's why I will not eat for a solid three hours before class starts, even though that seems kind of extreme for some people.
Next thing is the water - I must drink a minimum of two litres, and ideally, that's not even enough. It can be hard, though. Sometimes, if I know I haven't drank enough water throughout the day for whatever reason, I'll chug half a litre right before class starts. I know it's best to spread the water out but for me, it seems to make a big difference and it's a good last resort if I'm still worried. Also, because alcohol is very dehydrating and I for some reason find it difficult to drink great amounts of water when I'm hungover, it is always best if I haven't drank alcohol the night before my practice. (Of course!) I also try not to drink more than a smallish cup of coffee in the morning or consume any other dehydrating drinks.
Because I never get enough sleep, I'm always tired, and working in an office DOES NOT HELP, so I count on class in the evening to revitalize me. However, if I'm too tired, it's almost like it makes things worse. I usually go to a 6:15 class but I will go to 8:15 class and take a nap after work if I feel it is necessary (which it was last night), as that helps. Once I ate just a banana around two and a half hours prior to class and went to sleep for a around an hour and a half. I had a great class that night! But a nap is only a substitute for a good night's sleep. I couldn't imagine what class might feel like after a week of solid rest.
Then there is my mental state: sounds terrible, but often when I go to class with my sister we have broken out into a fight right before our practice and then made by our conscience to hastily make amends right before class starts, sometimes after we've already entered the hot room. Needless to say, this puts a damper on things, but it's not just fighting that can have a negative impact. Sometimes during and after work I find myself getting so irritated with people on the Skytrain or even just on the streets and through work and sitting in front of a computer all day can be just awful and draining. My after-work fatigue never helps my frame of mind and it's so busy downtown and sometimes these feelings build and build so that I find myself in a pretty bad mood right before I'm about to head off for yoga. This is definitely something I have to work on. If only I didn't work, my yoga practice would be so much better! I know that sounds like a given, but I find myself earnestly pondering this all the time.
Many other little things, such as the time of day of practice, the right outfit, the most comfortable hair-do, and having a good towel can also have an effect on the practice, but water, food, energy level and mindframe are the big ones. Of all of these, the only excuse strong enough to allow for me to justify not going to class, personally, would be eating too late. That would be the deal-breaker for me because I have done it in the past and truly suffered - suffered to the point where I couldn't participate in the postures. Under every other circumstance (besides maybe being sick with the flu or a really bad cold or something), I know I can make it to class and that I'll be better for it.
All of this standing, like I said - you can't always ensure that you'll have a good class. A bad class can just rise up out of nowhere when you least expect it. Granted, this has never happened when I've been in perfect form but I've had plenty of great classes where I was in much less than perfect form. (Let's face it, I'm hardly ever in perfect form.) Anyway, last night's class was almost going through the motions for me. I must have been really tired because I had to fight from closing my eyes during each Savasana and I really struggled to hold many of the poses. By the end of class my mind was completely elsewhere and I just wanted to go home.
But never mind, that's all right. I just remembered that I may be having a Toe Stand breakthrough. As I've mentioned, I have real problems with this pose. Namely, my knees (especially my left knee) is really weak. It just can't seem to hold me up, and when I first started I would often just stay in Tree rather than even make an attempt on this difficult pose. However, things seem to be looking up. I no longer have to cheat and bend my knees before my hands touch the ground on the way down, and my balance is much better now, particularly while I'm being held up by my left leg. It still hurts, but I can do it now whereas before I would just collapse. The only thing that is still practically impossible is coming up in form while balancing on my left leg (I practically give myself a stroke trying to come up) and, of course, getting my hands into Namaskar. It will be a long time before we see that day, my friends.
It is also worth mentioning that I was able to hold second set Standing Bow on both sides very well yesterday.
I'm still pumped for the 30 day challenge!
I really wanted to get into the habit of writing in here as soon as I finish class (or soon after) because that's when I remember everything. Now all I remember from Sunday and Monday's classes is that they were great, but yesterday wasn't so hot.
Lots of different stuff affects a practice and although it isn't really possible to guarantee a great class, there are certain things I can do to up my chances of having one. First and foremost, I have to have an empty stomach. If I can feel any food in there whatsoever I will be sluggish at best and, at worst, so dizzy and nauseous I'll have to lie down for extended periods. That's why I will not eat for a solid three hours before class starts, even though that seems kind of extreme for some people.
Next thing is the water - I must drink a minimum of two litres, and ideally, that's not even enough. It can be hard, though. Sometimes, if I know I haven't drank enough water throughout the day for whatever reason, I'll chug half a litre right before class starts. I know it's best to spread the water out but for me, it seems to make a big difference and it's a good last resort if I'm still worried. Also, because alcohol is very dehydrating and I for some reason find it difficult to drink great amounts of water when I'm hungover, it is always best if I haven't drank alcohol the night before my practice. (Of course!) I also try not to drink more than a smallish cup of coffee in the morning or consume any other dehydrating drinks.
Because I never get enough sleep, I'm always tired, and working in an office DOES NOT HELP, so I count on class in the evening to revitalize me. However, if I'm too tired, it's almost like it makes things worse. I usually go to a 6:15 class but I will go to 8:15 class and take a nap after work if I feel it is necessary (which it was last night), as that helps. Once I ate just a banana around two and a half hours prior to class and went to sleep for a around an hour and a half. I had a great class that night! But a nap is only a substitute for a good night's sleep. I couldn't imagine what class might feel like after a week of solid rest.
Then there is my mental state: sounds terrible, but often when I go to class with my sister we have broken out into a fight right before our practice and then made by our conscience to hastily make amends right before class starts, sometimes after we've already entered the hot room. Needless to say, this puts a damper on things, but it's not just fighting that can have a negative impact. Sometimes during and after work I find myself getting so irritated with people on the Skytrain or even just on the streets and through work and sitting in front of a computer all day can be just awful and draining. My after-work fatigue never helps my frame of mind and it's so busy downtown and sometimes these feelings build and build so that I find myself in a pretty bad mood right before I'm about to head off for yoga. This is definitely something I have to work on. If only I didn't work, my yoga practice would be so much better! I know that sounds like a given, but I find myself earnestly pondering this all the time.
Many other little things, such as the time of day of practice, the right outfit, the most comfortable hair-do, and having a good towel can also have an effect on the practice, but water, food, energy level and mindframe are the big ones. Of all of these, the only excuse strong enough to allow for me to justify not going to class, personally, would be eating too late. That would be the deal-breaker for me because I have done it in the past and truly suffered - suffered to the point where I couldn't participate in the postures. Under every other circumstance (besides maybe being sick with the flu or a really bad cold or something), I know I can make it to class and that I'll be better for it.
All of this standing, like I said - you can't always ensure that you'll have a good class. A bad class can just rise up out of nowhere when you least expect it. Granted, this has never happened when I've been in perfect form but I've had plenty of great classes where I was in much less than perfect form. (Let's face it, I'm hardly ever in perfect form.) Anyway, last night's class was almost going through the motions for me. I must have been really tired because I had to fight from closing my eyes during each Savasana and I really struggled to hold many of the poses. By the end of class my mind was completely elsewhere and I just wanted to go home.
But never mind, that's all right. I just remembered that I may be having a Toe Stand breakthrough. As I've mentioned, I have real problems with this pose. Namely, my knees (especially my left knee) is really weak. It just can't seem to hold me up, and when I first started I would often just stay in Tree rather than even make an attempt on this difficult pose. However, things seem to be looking up. I no longer have to cheat and bend my knees before my hands touch the ground on the way down, and my balance is much better now, particularly while I'm being held up by my left leg. It still hurts, but I can do it now whereas before I would just collapse. The only thing that is still practically impossible is coming up in form while balancing on my left leg (I practically give myself a stroke trying to come up) and, of course, getting my hands into Namaskar. It will be a long time before we see that day, my friends.
It is also worth mentioning that I was able to hold second set Standing Bow on both sides very well yesterday.
I'm still pumped for the 30 day challenge!
Sunday, April 30, 2006
30 Day Challenge
Whew! After going away for the weekend and drinking alcohol two days in a row (a fair bit of alcohol, I might add), I was worried about how class would go at 4:15 today. However, even though I didn't drink enough water today (which I really should have tried to with being so dehydrated already), I had a great class. My dizziness seems to have eased up, thank God.
The funny thing about Bikram's--and everyone knows this--is that you don't make steady progress in the same way that you do with many other activities and workouts. I'm not saying that not every class counts because I think that every class really does count for so much; I really believe in that build-up of "merit". However, like I was saying, with other sorts of activities (and maybe even other kinds of yoga) you get a feel for the routine and master aspects of it and expect to gain steadily. For instance, in Pilates, once you can "do" a pose or go to a particular depth in a pose, you can now "do it". Meaning, it usually doesn't happen that suddenly you find you can't do it anymore, or if you do, you suspect it's because you've sustained an injury. Similarly, with jogging, say, once you've worked your way up to a certain pace for a certain amount of time, you figure you'll be able to go that distance from a point onwards as long as you feel all right. If you're really tired or hung over or sick or some other extraneous circumstance is interfering with your jog that day, you adjust and know to take it easy, or know it's going to be *that much harder*. I'm not saying that other workouts don't vary, but I don't get surprised all that often.
Think it's like this with Bikram's Yoga? No. It can be very surprising. I've only been practicing this yoga for a month and a half and I'm already amazed at the variance I've seen in my body with particular poses on certain days. Specifically, I will be fairly happy with a certain pose and feel that it is getting progressively less difficult for several classes only to get going in class and find that suddenly it has become one of the hardest of the 26 poses! And it will stay that way, class after class. So far, this has happened to me with the following:
1. Awkward Pose (the first part has become impossible - I just can't get down).
2. Eagle Pose (I can't seem to make any progress with this pose and it's become really hard to balance).
3. Standing Bow (everything in the world has gone wrong with this pose - I can't keep my balance, I can't get my leg up, I can't get my arm up, and it exhausts me).
4. Balancing stick (all of a sudden this pose is torture - I dread it and sweat buckets throughout).
5. Standing Separate Leg Head-to-Knee (in a big way for at least six classes, but finally a breakthrough! Now I'm better than ever with this pose and have almost straightened out my knee).
6. Tree (the most relaxing pose of all has become very hard to balance, have no clue how this has happened).
7. Rabbit (this pose has been unique torture for at least ten classes - my sister feels the same way).
8. Head-to-Knee (my hamstrings are in pain for the entire three-part posture. This one hurts like hell these days, but it may be that I am going deeper whereas I wasn't challenging myself very much in the earlier days).
Of course, it's worth mentioning that some poses actually get a lot easier and I find myself wondering how they ever gave me so much trouble to begin with (especially since the "newly difficult" poses now seem so much more dreadful in comparison. In any case, like I said - it goes up and down and you just never know what kind of class you're going to have.
***My studio is having a 30-day challenge beginning May 15th and I've decided I'd like to go for it. So far I've only been five classes in a row at most and I've really only been able to maintain a practice of 4-5 classes per week, but I figure this is a great opportunity. Going away out of town several times and overly busy weekends have been the main interferences with my practice. I had planned to go camping for the May-long weekend but I'm not that heartbroken over cancelling, and I'd far prefer to stay in town over this long weekend as opposed to later on in the summer. I can foresee no major events between the fifteenth days of May and June and as I anticipate my practice slowing down in the summer with hot weather and a busy schedule and going out of town, this is the perfect way to finish off the intensity of my first three months of Bikram Yoga. I'm excited!
The funny thing about Bikram's--and everyone knows this--is that you don't make steady progress in the same way that you do with many other activities and workouts. I'm not saying that not every class counts because I think that every class really does count for so much; I really believe in that build-up of "merit". However, like I was saying, with other sorts of activities (and maybe even other kinds of yoga) you get a feel for the routine and master aspects of it and expect to gain steadily. For instance, in Pilates, once you can "do" a pose or go to a particular depth in a pose, you can now "do it". Meaning, it usually doesn't happen that suddenly you find you can't do it anymore, or if you do, you suspect it's because you've sustained an injury. Similarly, with jogging, say, once you've worked your way up to a certain pace for a certain amount of time, you figure you'll be able to go that distance from a point onwards as long as you feel all right. If you're really tired or hung over or sick or some other extraneous circumstance is interfering with your jog that day, you adjust and know to take it easy, or know it's going to be *that much harder*. I'm not saying that other workouts don't vary, but I don't get surprised all that often.
Think it's like this with Bikram's Yoga? No. It can be very surprising. I've only been practicing this yoga for a month and a half and I'm already amazed at the variance I've seen in my body with particular poses on certain days. Specifically, I will be fairly happy with a certain pose and feel that it is getting progressively less difficult for several classes only to get going in class and find that suddenly it has become one of the hardest of the 26 poses! And it will stay that way, class after class. So far, this has happened to me with the following:
1. Awkward Pose (the first part has become impossible - I just can't get down).
2. Eagle Pose (I can't seem to make any progress with this pose and it's become really hard to balance).
3. Standing Bow (everything in the world has gone wrong with this pose - I can't keep my balance, I can't get my leg up, I can't get my arm up, and it exhausts me).
4. Balancing stick (all of a sudden this pose is torture - I dread it and sweat buckets throughout).
5. Standing Separate Leg Head-to-Knee (in a big way for at least six classes, but finally a breakthrough! Now I'm better than ever with this pose and have almost straightened out my knee).
6. Tree (the most relaxing pose of all has become very hard to balance, have no clue how this has happened).
7. Rabbit (this pose has been unique torture for at least ten classes - my sister feels the same way).
8. Head-to-Knee (my hamstrings are in pain for the entire three-part posture. This one hurts like hell these days, but it may be that I am going deeper whereas I wasn't challenging myself very much in the earlier days).
Of course, it's worth mentioning that some poses actually get a lot easier and I find myself wondering how they ever gave me so much trouble to begin with (especially since the "newly difficult" poses now seem so much more dreadful in comparison. In any case, like I said - it goes up and down and you just never know what kind of class you're going to have.
***My studio is having a 30-day challenge beginning May 15th and I've decided I'd like to go for it. So far I've only been five classes in a row at most and I've really only been able to maintain a practice of 4-5 classes per week, but I figure this is a great opportunity. Going away out of town several times and overly busy weekends have been the main interferences with my practice. I had planned to go camping for the May-long weekend but I'm not that heartbroken over cancelling, and I'd far prefer to stay in town over this long weekend as opposed to later on in the summer. I can foresee no major events between the fifteenth days of May and June and as I anticipate my practice slowing down in the summer with hot weather and a busy schedule and going out of town, this is the perfect way to finish off the intensity of my first three months of Bikram Yoga. I'm excited!
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Lock the Knee
That's what the New West studio is called! I really like that. How appropriate.
Speaking of locking the knee, I do think that I'm improving. The hardest pose in which you must lock your knee is, of course, Standing Head-to-Knee. I think that having each knee locked firmly for the full sixty seconds on each side would be an amazing feat. I sometimes wonder if there is anything I can do outside of class to further me along in this area. However, I suppose that each person chugs along at their own pace, and I have heard it been said that this can take up to six months, so I'm hardly there yet.
Until I'm there, though, Standing Bow just won't look right.
Speaking of locking the knee, I do think that I'm improving. The hardest pose in which you must lock your knee is, of course, Standing Head-to-Knee. I think that having each knee locked firmly for the full sixty seconds on each side would be an amazing feat. I sometimes wonder if there is anything I can do outside of class to further me along in this area. However, I suppose that each person chugs along at their own pace, and I have heard it been said that this can take up to six months, so I'm hardly there yet.
Until I'm there, though, Standing Bow just won't look right.
Sunday, April 23, 2006
The big 2-6
Last week wasn't a good week for yoga, to be perfectly honest. The problem is that...well, there certainly isn't just one problem. Where do I begin? Let me go through each posture and breathing exersise and describe the various difficulties.
1. Pranayama Breathing
On pretty steady ground with this one, actually. I can get my elbows up pretty high and I've become quite good at inhaling and exhaling for a count of six. Others in class seem to be having trouble with their timing. It's still difficult, though, and it seems to last forever.
2. Half Moon Pose
Oh. God. This pose alone is as hard for me as at least ten others put together; I find it excruciating. First of all, I can't jut my hips out very far to the right or left. My form is much better now that I have finally learned to push my arms back behind my ears as far as they'll go, as previously, the location of my big old head made it impossible for me to lock my arms and glue my palms together at the same time; it was either one or the other. It still takes incredible effort to hold each side for sixty seconds, and it doesn't help that my arms hyperextend. Anyway, I now feel home-free after the first set of left and right. On to pose 2, the backbend: the only saving grace of this pose is that it doesn't last sixty seconds. I can go back quite a bit further than I could when I started, but it hurts like hell (as the instructors frequently remind us) and I still find it extremely hard to breathe! What's with that? Also, it's hard to bring my arms back with my head. Anyway, I can't help but to be sure to take it easy with the U-turn into forward bending because this feels really hard on my lower back. As soon as my hands touch the ground and I begin to walk my hips out, I am sometimes amazed by the pain. (I always feel much better in second set, though.) Anyway, despite my bitter complaining up to this point, pose 3 of Half Moon is actually the most difficult. I'm not flexible naturally, and although I can bend further from my hips and my legs are straighter, my knees are nowhere near locked. Also, I tend to want to cheat and not touch my legs with my face. AND I don't know what is wrong with me because everyone else seems to be able to do it just fine, but when I place my palms under my feet, I can't get my pinky fingers side-by-side! I bend way down and give it an honest try, but I simply cannot even get into the position let alone hold it. So although my hands are well under my feet, they stick out from the sides still. Oh well. Again, the second set is much easier going than the first, as is not always the case in Bikram's.
3. Awkward Pose
If I was to use the word "like" in regards to any of the poses, I might use it for Utkatasana. But I'm not prepared to use that word yet! I'm getting much better getting into the first part of the pose, and I actually got some good advice from the instructor at Calgary Hot Yoga: don't even think about it before you drop. Just drop. The second part of the pose is more difficult as I only began to get up fully on my tiptoes a couple of classes ago. It's hard to hold, and I shake. I feel some pretty heavy temptation to drop my feet down a bit and I used to give in, but I'm trying really hard to keep my heels way up now. As a result, I can't get as far down. That's all right, of course. I work very hard at going down into the third part of the pose to a count of ten and I can usually do it, but coming up is really hard. I've noticed people racing up, and I try to stay among the slowest. However, I don't bounce up and down like I am "on a motorcycle" because I find it too hard on my knees. I don't know what's wrong with them but they hurt a lot in class.
4. Eagle Pose
As I strive to improve this posture, hidden difficulties have surfaced. I have always been able to hold the pose quite well but now that I am going deeper, I've begun to lose my balance a little bit. I can't get my foot around the side of my calf completely, but I've noticed other students lifting the leg up quite high before wrapping it around the opposite leg and I've been trying it, but so far, I haven't been able to go any further. I can't get very low in Garaurasana because I feel that I'm still working so hard on my form! I'm going to try getting my hands into prayer this week and really improve my concentration. I find I'm thinking about water way too much during this pose!
5. Standing head-to-knee
This pose is so tough it's not even that tough yet, if that makes any sense, because I'm still stuck at the very beginning stage. I can now lock my knee for up to fifteen/twenty seconds, but that's still the limit for me. I'm lucky if I can hold each side for sixty seconds on the first set let alone keep my knee locked the entire time and kick out! I've tentatively kicked out a couple of times but I'm really not ready yet. I can usually hold second set for the full thirty seconds but as I mentioned, my knee is not completely locked the whole time. This pose takes a hell of a lot of concentration. I find that I go a lot smoother if I concentrate really hard on locking my knee before I even lift the foot of the opposite leg off of the ground. I think I'll see steady improvement with this pose, but it's very slow-going.
6. Standing Bow
Oh my gosh, I find this pose most aesthetically pleasing and I really yearn to go deeper into it. I really see a difference between my right and left side in this pose as I am much more comfortable on the right and I am able to kick up higher. My kick isn't that bad for a beginner, I think. I find the advice "if you're losing your balance, kick harder" to be very truthful. I have held the pose for the full sixty seconds on each side in the first set only about twice or three times, but I find it incredible tough. (Of course!) However, now I can usually hold second set for the full thirty seconds on each side so I am glad for that. If my balance is good that day I am really satisfied with going deeper into the pose for the final five seconds, but I am often feeling weak at this point. As I've mentioned, I'm not naturally flexible, particularly in the legs. I've never been able to do the splits fully, so I don't know how high I'll ever get. This seems to be a tough one for many in the classes.
7. Balancing Stick
I love the expression "you can do anything for ten seconds". Hah! We often have to hold Tuladandasana for longer than ten seconds - of that I'm sure. Lately I have felt exhausted by this pose and I find it makes me dizzy. Anyway, I didn't mind this one when I first started Bikram's but now I almost dread it. I don't know what I look like from the side, but I'm pretty sure it's not a "T"!
8. Standing Separate Leg Stretching
Arghhh! Here's where my problems really begin as this pose and the next two have left me feeling dizzy and weak. I think it's possible I'm not drinking enough water, especially since Canadian Springs went on strike. Anyway, I feel really unflexible in this pose. I can't spread my legs out very far to begin with, and my head certainly isn't touching the ground. During a good class, this pose feels all right, but during a bad class, it's really rough as my legs and back feel really tight. I can't get my hands under my heels yet; they are still underneath the middle of my feet. If I feel all right, I find it's a good idea to pull hardest at the last few seconds as I have made some real progress this way - it's important to really bend from the hips and get them high up.
9. Triangle Pose
Half-way mark! But oh my Lord this one just about kills me. Unbelievably--if my outstretched foot isn't slipping and sliding all over the place as it often is--I have developed pretty decent form in this pose (I know because I've actually been complimented on it by a teacher and recently received the most minimal of corrections). But it takes the utmost in effort to hold this nightmare pose, "the marriage of the heart and the lungs", and at no other point during class do I feel the desire stronger to collapse into Savasana!! I have skipped second set more than a couple times, I am ashamed to admit. It's just so damn hard! I think it's because I used to cheat by leaning hand pressure on the foot of the bent knee and not bending my knee to the full 90 degree angle. I do everything properly now, though, and sometimes it feels next to impossible to hold. But I keep chugging along. Once again, I find this particular pose very lovely (except when I'm in it, as I look like a shaky, pudgy mess).
10. Standing Separate Leg Head-to-Knee
When did this pose get so hard? Lately I've been getting really dizzy on my way down, and all I can think of at this point is hitting the floor in a few minutes. It took me a while to get good form in this one, and I have to concentrate on keeping my hips in line before descending. My leg in front is not straight yet; again, problems with the flexibility. It really is hard to breathe in this one, but they tell us that's normal. I've become tempted to skip a set, which is funny because when I first started I really did not have a problem with doing this pose - must have been because I wasn't doing it right! I find I need a lot of control on the ascent, or else I wobble.
11. Tree Pose
Tree is supposed to be relaxing, but I have not relaxed very well into it lately. I can't get both hands into prayer - maybe if I wore shorts, and I really should. I find it really difficult to straighten out my back and I just don't look all that good or comfortable in Tree. Bad posture! Also, my knees just kill me when I release my bent leg. I need to concentrate and meditate better in Tadasana because I can't stop thinking of Savasana!!
12. Toe Stand
Oh oh. I actually asked for extra help after class with Toe Stand because I was starting to feel that I was the only one unable to get to the floor without completely collapsing every time and falling right on my bum (I haven't improved vastly, but at least I know I'm capable of the pose now!) It takes a lot of strength for me to attempt Toe Stand but on a good day I can do the modified version (ie I can't get my hands into prayer, not even close). My knees, though - man are they ever weak! I don't get my foot up very high on my leg before heading down for this one but apparently that's okay. I can almost reach the floor without bending my standing leg but not quite, so I'm working on that. I look awful in this pose, I feel, very slouched and on the verge of falling over, which happens quite regularly! Getting up again is a nightmare, but I can do it now. Toe Stand continues to test my knees and overall strength on every attempt.
13. Savasana
Ah, freaking finally. I'm pretty good at laying still, and it is important to me to do so. I feel distracted by others in the class that move about constantly and really take their time getting into position (or so it seems). Sometimes I really want to itch or wipe but I try not to. I must say that I don't really like looking up at the flourescent lights, but I don't suppose there's anything that can be done about that.
14. Wind Removing Pose
Not much to say here - I went through a period during which I was having trouble grabbing at the elbow in the third part of the pose, but now I'm fine with it (though I find it hard to breathe and forget about lying my head flat). I have a lot of room to improve flexibility in my back and hips in this pose, and sometimes my hips pinch to the point of real discomfort. Still in relaxed mode from wonderful Savasana, though.
15. Sit-Up
Sit-up is fine, I suppose. I'm still sort of working on the double exhale but I think I've almost got it down. Of course, always looking to improve flexibility in my legs, and the sit-up really helps for later on during Head-to-Knee.
16. Cobra
Yikes, class sure gets tough again with the spine-strengthening series! This pose isn't too hard, but it's easy to slack off in it and rely on your arms. I try my best not to, of course.
17. Locust
I used to dread lifting both legs at the same time, but now it's the individual leg lifting that I face most difficulty with. First of all, it's hard to keep my hips in line. Second, I don't know how high up I'm getting my leg. High enough? Who knows. I'm still not getting my legs all that high up in the third part of the pose and you can really hear me groaning after each set!
18. Full Locust
It's sure getting easy to slack off in Full Locust! Generally, this pose is just really trying and it can feel awful to hold it while giving 100% honest effort...what else can I say? It can be done, but it hurts!
19. Bow Pose
Bow is my least favourite of the spine-strengthening series because I find that the full twenty seconds is excruciating. I also find that the right and left sides of my body look somewhat misaligned when I steal a glance in the mirror, like one hip (and, consequently, leg and foot) is in a different position than the other. To tell you the truth, I really have trouble holding this pose, and I am so relieved when it's over.
20. Fixed Firm
I always find that getting up from the spine-strengthening series gives me a head rush unless I take it very, very slow. So I can't always begin the pose at the same time as everyone else. However, it's not clear to me why so many people have difficulty getting all the way down in Fixed Firm because I've been able to do it from the very start and I don't find it hard on my knees. Usually if anyone finds anything particularly difficult, it's going to be me, and whenever teachers allude to a particular difficulty, it's like they're speaking directly to me! Must be because I've never really been a runner. I think it's athletes or the injured that struggle on this one. I'm not sure about raising my chest after getting into position, though. This is a nice one, and almost relaxing (though that probably means I'm "doing it wrong")!
21. Half-Tortoise
On the way down I can finally get my forehead touching the ground before my arms, but not every time, and I do feel the urge to just drop. This pose takes a lot of control. I actually don't find this pose all that relaxing, especially with trying to get my forehead and nose on the ground at the same time as I lock out my arms. The teacher at Calgary Hot Yoga got on top of my back while I was in Ardha Kurmasana and I was really surprised at how far she was able to push me down. Is that from bad posture? It actually felt pretty good.
22. Camel Pose
Oh yeah, here's the "torture chamber" for you. If I do this pose at all, and sometimes I lie in Savasana right through the second set, I must admit, I have to go all the way down, otherwise I just can't breathe. I die in Camel, I swear to God. Nothing I can really say about improving my form as I think that it is all right, and I always just out my hips and stomach, but it's just so hard to hold and it wears me right out. I find it really hard to get through two full sets and YES I feel dizzy and nauseous upon ascending!
23. Rabbit
Hmmm. Because of Rabbit, I can't wear my hair in a high ponytail, which would otherwise be ideal because I can't stand lying on the lump my hair forms during Savasana. Rabbit is far from comfortable, but it's doable. I like how it stretches my upper back and it's a neat pose. Tough, as always.
24. Head-to-Knee
Begun to dread this one, strangely. I can't get my individual legs completely straight in the first part of the pose but I've been pushing myself recently and I may be improving. I feel really tight, though. In part two, I am finally able to not only get my legs locked out in front as I grab my toes, but also lift my heels for about ten or fifteen seconds or so. Not quite the full length, as it gets really painful and hard to breathe evenly. My back is surely slouched. This appears to consume all of my remaining energy, though! Whew! So far I can't get my torso very low at my legs, but this is one pose in which I've seen steady, consistent improvement, so I'm working at it.
25. Spine-Twisting Pose
I don't mind this pose. No issues here, except I've got to halt feelings of elation that the class is just about over and work on being more mindful.
26. Kapalbhati Breathing
Okay, I'm not sure if anyone else has issues, but I find this breathing exersise difficult to execute. Sometimes I'm sure I'm doing it right, but then I compare the movement of my stomach to others and it seems like my breathing is off. In any case, although this is a short one (not to mention the closer!), I can't wait to get through it. Sometimes I get a cramp in one or both of my feet and I almost have to get into cross-legged position, but I always tough it out. I don't know why I get this cramp. Also, in second set, (which, of course, is faster), I sometimes feel a weird pressure between my eyes, almost in my sinuses.
Well, that's where I stand with all 26. I hope this week is better than last, because I can't stand the dizziness anymore.
And just because I'm a yogini now:
Namaste :)
1. Pranayama Breathing
On pretty steady ground with this one, actually. I can get my elbows up pretty high and I've become quite good at inhaling and exhaling for a count of six. Others in class seem to be having trouble with their timing. It's still difficult, though, and it seems to last forever.
2. Half Moon Pose
Oh. God. This pose alone is as hard for me as at least ten others put together; I find it excruciating. First of all, I can't jut my hips out very far to the right or left. My form is much better now that I have finally learned to push my arms back behind my ears as far as they'll go, as previously, the location of my big old head made it impossible for me to lock my arms and glue my palms together at the same time; it was either one or the other. It still takes incredible effort to hold each side for sixty seconds, and it doesn't help that my arms hyperextend. Anyway, I now feel home-free after the first set of left and right. On to pose 2, the backbend: the only saving grace of this pose is that it doesn't last sixty seconds. I can go back quite a bit further than I could when I started, but it hurts like hell (as the instructors frequently remind us) and I still find it extremely hard to breathe! What's with that? Also, it's hard to bring my arms back with my head. Anyway, I can't help but to be sure to take it easy with the U-turn into forward bending because this feels really hard on my lower back. As soon as my hands touch the ground and I begin to walk my hips out, I am sometimes amazed by the pain. (I always feel much better in second set, though.) Anyway, despite my bitter complaining up to this point, pose 3 of Half Moon is actually the most difficult. I'm not flexible naturally, and although I can bend further from my hips and my legs are straighter, my knees are nowhere near locked. Also, I tend to want to cheat and not touch my legs with my face. AND I don't know what is wrong with me because everyone else seems to be able to do it just fine, but when I place my palms under my feet, I can't get my pinky fingers side-by-side! I bend way down and give it an honest try, but I simply cannot even get into the position let alone hold it. So although my hands are well under my feet, they stick out from the sides still. Oh well. Again, the second set is much easier going than the first, as is not always the case in Bikram's.
3. Awkward Pose
If I was to use the word "like" in regards to any of the poses, I might use it for Utkatasana. But I'm not prepared to use that word yet! I'm getting much better getting into the first part of the pose, and I actually got some good advice from the instructor at Calgary Hot Yoga: don't even think about it before you drop. Just drop. The second part of the pose is more difficult as I only began to get up fully on my tiptoes a couple of classes ago. It's hard to hold, and I shake. I feel some pretty heavy temptation to drop my feet down a bit and I used to give in, but I'm trying really hard to keep my heels way up now. As a result, I can't get as far down. That's all right, of course. I work very hard at going down into the third part of the pose to a count of ten and I can usually do it, but coming up is really hard. I've noticed people racing up, and I try to stay among the slowest. However, I don't bounce up and down like I am "on a motorcycle" because I find it too hard on my knees. I don't know what's wrong with them but they hurt a lot in class.
4. Eagle Pose
As I strive to improve this posture, hidden difficulties have surfaced. I have always been able to hold the pose quite well but now that I am going deeper, I've begun to lose my balance a little bit. I can't get my foot around the side of my calf completely, but I've noticed other students lifting the leg up quite high before wrapping it around the opposite leg and I've been trying it, but so far, I haven't been able to go any further. I can't get very low in Garaurasana because I feel that I'm still working so hard on my form! I'm going to try getting my hands into prayer this week and really improve my concentration. I find I'm thinking about water way too much during this pose!
5. Standing head-to-knee
This pose is so tough it's not even that tough yet, if that makes any sense, because I'm still stuck at the very beginning stage. I can now lock my knee for up to fifteen/twenty seconds, but that's still the limit for me. I'm lucky if I can hold each side for sixty seconds on the first set let alone keep my knee locked the entire time and kick out! I've tentatively kicked out a couple of times but I'm really not ready yet. I can usually hold second set for the full thirty seconds but as I mentioned, my knee is not completely locked the whole time. This pose takes a hell of a lot of concentration. I find that I go a lot smoother if I concentrate really hard on locking my knee before I even lift the foot of the opposite leg off of the ground. I think I'll see steady improvement with this pose, but it's very slow-going.
6. Standing Bow
Oh my gosh, I find this pose most aesthetically pleasing and I really yearn to go deeper into it. I really see a difference between my right and left side in this pose as I am much more comfortable on the right and I am able to kick up higher. My kick isn't that bad for a beginner, I think. I find the advice "if you're losing your balance, kick harder" to be very truthful. I have held the pose for the full sixty seconds on each side in the first set only about twice or three times, but I find it incredible tough. (Of course!) However, now I can usually hold second set for the full thirty seconds on each side so I am glad for that. If my balance is good that day I am really satisfied with going deeper into the pose for the final five seconds, but I am often feeling weak at this point. As I've mentioned, I'm not naturally flexible, particularly in the legs. I've never been able to do the splits fully, so I don't know how high I'll ever get. This seems to be a tough one for many in the classes.
7. Balancing Stick
I love the expression "you can do anything for ten seconds". Hah! We often have to hold Tuladandasana for longer than ten seconds - of that I'm sure. Lately I have felt exhausted by this pose and I find it makes me dizzy. Anyway, I didn't mind this one when I first started Bikram's but now I almost dread it. I don't know what I look like from the side, but I'm pretty sure it's not a "T"!
8. Standing Separate Leg Stretching
Arghhh! Here's where my problems really begin as this pose and the next two have left me feeling dizzy and weak. I think it's possible I'm not drinking enough water, especially since Canadian Springs went on strike. Anyway, I feel really unflexible in this pose. I can't spread my legs out very far to begin with, and my head certainly isn't touching the ground. During a good class, this pose feels all right, but during a bad class, it's really rough as my legs and back feel really tight. I can't get my hands under my heels yet; they are still underneath the middle of my feet. If I feel all right, I find it's a good idea to pull hardest at the last few seconds as I have made some real progress this way - it's important to really bend from the hips and get them high up.
9. Triangle Pose
Half-way mark! But oh my Lord this one just about kills me. Unbelievably--if my outstretched foot isn't slipping and sliding all over the place as it often is--I have developed pretty decent form in this pose (I know because I've actually been complimented on it by a teacher and recently received the most minimal of corrections). But it takes the utmost in effort to hold this nightmare pose, "the marriage of the heart and the lungs", and at no other point during class do I feel the desire stronger to collapse into Savasana!! I have skipped second set more than a couple times, I am ashamed to admit. It's just so damn hard! I think it's because I used to cheat by leaning hand pressure on the foot of the bent knee and not bending my knee to the full 90 degree angle. I do everything properly now, though, and sometimes it feels next to impossible to hold. But I keep chugging along. Once again, I find this particular pose very lovely (except when I'm in it, as I look like a shaky, pudgy mess).
10. Standing Separate Leg Head-to-Knee
When did this pose get so hard? Lately I've been getting really dizzy on my way down, and all I can think of at this point is hitting the floor in a few minutes. It took me a while to get good form in this one, and I have to concentrate on keeping my hips in line before descending. My leg in front is not straight yet; again, problems with the flexibility. It really is hard to breathe in this one, but they tell us that's normal. I've become tempted to skip a set, which is funny because when I first started I really did not have a problem with doing this pose - must have been because I wasn't doing it right! I find I need a lot of control on the ascent, or else I wobble.
11. Tree Pose
Tree is supposed to be relaxing, but I have not relaxed very well into it lately. I can't get both hands into prayer - maybe if I wore shorts, and I really should. I find it really difficult to straighten out my back and I just don't look all that good or comfortable in Tree. Bad posture! Also, my knees just kill me when I release my bent leg. I need to concentrate and meditate better in Tadasana because I can't stop thinking of Savasana!!
12. Toe Stand
Oh oh. I actually asked for extra help after class with Toe Stand because I was starting to feel that I was the only one unable to get to the floor without completely collapsing every time and falling right on my bum (I haven't improved vastly, but at least I know I'm capable of the pose now!) It takes a lot of strength for me to attempt Toe Stand but on a good day I can do the modified version (ie I can't get my hands into prayer, not even close). My knees, though - man are they ever weak! I don't get my foot up very high on my leg before heading down for this one but apparently that's okay. I can almost reach the floor without bending my standing leg but not quite, so I'm working on that. I look awful in this pose, I feel, very slouched and on the verge of falling over, which happens quite regularly! Getting up again is a nightmare, but I can do it now. Toe Stand continues to test my knees and overall strength on every attempt.
13. Savasana
Ah, freaking finally. I'm pretty good at laying still, and it is important to me to do so. I feel distracted by others in the class that move about constantly and really take their time getting into position (or so it seems). Sometimes I really want to itch or wipe but I try not to. I must say that I don't really like looking up at the flourescent lights, but I don't suppose there's anything that can be done about that.
14. Wind Removing Pose
Not much to say here - I went through a period during which I was having trouble grabbing at the elbow in the third part of the pose, but now I'm fine with it (though I find it hard to breathe and forget about lying my head flat). I have a lot of room to improve flexibility in my back and hips in this pose, and sometimes my hips pinch to the point of real discomfort. Still in relaxed mode from wonderful Savasana, though.
15. Sit-Up
Sit-up is fine, I suppose. I'm still sort of working on the double exhale but I think I've almost got it down. Of course, always looking to improve flexibility in my legs, and the sit-up really helps for later on during Head-to-Knee.
16. Cobra
Yikes, class sure gets tough again with the spine-strengthening series! This pose isn't too hard, but it's easy to slack off in it and rely on your arms. I try my best not to, of course.
17. Locust
I used to dread lifting both legs at the same time, but now it's the individual leg lifting that I face most difficulty with. First of all, it's hard to keep my hips in line. Second, I don't know how high up I'm getting my leg. High enough? Who knows. I'm still not getting my legs all that high up in the third part of the pose and you can really hear me groaning after each set!
18. Full Locust
It's sure getting easy to slack off in Full Locust! Generally, this pose is just really trying and it can feel awful to hold it while giving 100% honest effort...what else can I say? It can be done, but it hurts!
19. Bow Pose
Bow is my least favourite of the spine-strengthening series because I find that the full twenty seconds is excruciating. I also find that the right and left sides of my body look somewhat misaligned when I steal a glance in the mirror, like one hip (and, consequently, leg and foot) is in a different position than the other. To tell you the truth, I really have trouble holding this pose, and I am so relieved when it's over.
20. Fixed Firm
I always find that getting up from the spine-strengthening series gives me a head rush unless I take it very, very slow. So I can't always begin the pose at the same time as everyone else. However, it's not clear to me why so many people have difficulty getting all the way down in Fixed Firm because I've been able to do it from the very start and I don't find it hard on my knees. Usually if anyone finds anything particularly difficult, it's going to be me, and whenever teachers allude to a particular difficulty, it's like they're speaking directly to me! Must be because I've never really been a runner. I think it's athletes or the injured that struggle on this one. I'm not sure about raising my chest after getting into position, though. This is a nice one, and almost relaxing (though that probably means I'm "doing it wrong")!
21. Half-Tortoise
On the way down I can finally get my forehead touching the ground before my arms, but not every time, and I do feel the urge to just drop. This pose takes a lot of control. I actually don't find this pose all that relaxing, especially with trying to get my forehead and nose on the ground at the same time as I lock out my arms. The teacher at Calgary Hot Yoga got on top of my back while I was in Ardha Kurmasana and I was really surprised at how far she was able to push me down. Is that from bad posture? It actually felt pretty good.
22. Camel Pose
Oh yeah, here's the "torture chamber" for you. If I do this pose at all, and sometimes I lie in Savasana right through the second set, I must admit, I have to go all the way down, otherwise I just can't breathe. I die in Camel, I swear to God. Nothing I can really say about improving my form as I think that it is all right, and I always just out my hips and stomach, but it's just so hard to hold and it wears me right out. I find it really hard to get through two full sets and YES I feel dizzy and nauseous upon ascending!
23. Rabbit
Hmmm. Because of Rabbit, I can't wear my hair in a high ponytail, which would otherwise be ideal because I can't stand lying on the lump my hair forms during Savasana. Rabbit is far from comfortable, but it's doable. I like how it stretches my upper back and it's a neat pose. Tough, as always.
24. Head-to-Knee
Begun to dread this one, strangely. I can't get my individual legs completely straight in the first part of the pose but I've been pushing myself recently and I may be improving. I feel really tight, though. In part two, I am finally able to not only get my legs locked out in front as I grab my toes, but also lift my heels for about ten or fifteen seconds or so. Not quite the full length, as it gets really painful and hard to breathe evenly. My back is surely slouched. This appears to consume all of my remaining energy, though! Whew! So far I can't get my torso very low at my legs, but this is one pose in which I've seen steady, consistent improvement, so I'm working at it.
25. Spine-Twisting Pose
I don't mind this pose. No issues here, except I've got to halt feelings of elation that the class is just about over and work on being more mindful.
26. Kapalbhati Breathing
Okay, I'm not sure if anyone else has issues, but I find this breathing exersise difficult to execute. Sometimes I'm sure I'm doing it right, but then I compare the movement of my stomach to others and it seems like my breathing is off. In any case, although this is a short one (not to mention the closer!), I can't wait to get through it. Sometimes I get a cramp in one or both of my feet and I almost have to get into cross-legged position, but I always tough it out. I don't know why I get this cramp. Also, in second set, (which, of course, is faster), I sometimes feel a weird pressure between my eyes, almost in my sinuses.
Well, that's where I stand with all 26. I hope this week is better than last, because I can't stand the dizziness anymore.
And just because I'm a yogini now:
Namaste :)
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